We don’t need any further explanation, do we? No, no we don’t. Besides, I’m in a funk. I’d like to not be in a funk.
Oh, if you’d like to read the Bullshit Generic Begging Letter, then please see the previous post.
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To: Pitching the World
From: Ruby Ormerod, Green Pebble
Subject: Chancing my arm
Date: 05/01/2012
Hi Steve
Love your letter, and if we had work I would happily farm it out to you. At the moment, given the economic forecasts, we have put our books on hold and are focusing on our art greeting cards.
Our cards are blank inside, so sadly I can’t even test your poetry skills…of which I have no doubt you have plenty.
Sorry, and best of luck,
Ruby Ormerod
Editor
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To: Pitching the World
From: Thomas Clarke, Golf Monthly
Subject: Chancing my arm
Date: 05/01/2012
To: Pitching the World
From: Geordie Torr, Geographical
Subject: Chancing my arm
Date: 06/01/2012
Hi Steve,
To be honest, I don’t pitch stuff out to freelancers very often – I’m too busy to come up with stories myself and when I do, I have one go-to guy who I pretty much always, well, go to. But if you come up with any feature ideas that you think might work for us, drop me a line and I’ll have a look.
All the best,
Geordie
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To: Pitching the World
From: Poetry Review
Subject: Chancing my arm
Date: 06/01/2012
Marvellous, but the writers’ and artists’ yearbook points out that you have to at least pretend to know the magazine by a) addressing the actual editor and b) displaying some knowledge of content. We are a poetry magazine. The clue is in the title, but I’m sure you just cc’d us. So all the things you offer are irrelevant.
It’s difficult, because this is a recession and one wants to help people out – but if you really seriously need work wouldn’t it be better to actually *get* some, e.g. by offering your freelance services to political periodicals at the least, rather than just running a gimmick?
So – confused as to your real motives but wishing you well if it’s work you’re after –
Yours, etc
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To: Pitching the World
From: Milan Rai, Peace News
Subject: Chancing my arm
Date: 08/01/2012
Hi Steven
Thanks for your mail. Unfortunately we don’t pay contributors but there’s no reason you shouldn’t have something published in PN if that isn’t an obstacle.
Given that our remit is war and peace, perhaps the best thing would be something provocatively right-wing, 500 words. I’m not sure of your politics – your blog is not clear on your leanings.
Best wishes
Milan Rai,
Peace News co-editor
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Thoughts? My thoughts are that I’d like to drink until I black out, but I always want to do that. Please let me know yours though, either here in the comments or by emailing: pitchingtheworld*at*hotmail.com.
Thanks, as always.
Pitching the World 